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Tag: pray & joke

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6 months ago  •  28  • Reblog
#zodiac #astrology #links #pray

“Heavenly Father, as I prepare to consume this last fifth of Scotch to drown out my pain and sorrow, may my inebriation be for Thy greater Honor and Glory.”

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1 year ago  •  26  • Reblog
#joke #pray

“Hi God! Some say you’re a man. Some say you’re a woman. I say we’re all God. So, why pray? Let’s have a party!”

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1 year ago  •  28  • Reblog
#joke #pray

“Dear Father, I was going to pray, but I guess I ought to figure things out for myself. Thanks anyway.”

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1 year ago  •  33  • Reblog
#joke #pray

“OH ALMIGHTY, ALL KNOWING, ALL-LOVING, ALL-POWERFUL, OMNIPRESENT, EVERLASTING GOD, IF I’VE ASKED YOU ONCE, I’VE ASKED YOU A THOUSAND TIMES —- HELP ME STOP EXAGGERATING!!!!!!!!!!”

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1 year ago  •  17  • Reblog
#joke #pray

 “Dear God, help me forgive my enemies, even if the bastards don’t deserve it.”

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1 year ago  •  71  • Reblog
#joke #pray

“Dear God, I know I should make decisions for myself. But, on the other hand, what do you think?”

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1 year ago  •  14  • Reblog
#joke #pray

“Dear God, please make the world a better place, and don’t screw it up like you did the last time.”

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1 year ago  •  26  • Reblog
#joke #pray

“Hi, Pop! I’ll bet you’re really proud to have me as your kid!”

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1 year ago  •  15  • Reblog
#joke #pray

“Dear Daddy, I know I shouldn’t depend on you so much, but you’re the only One I can count on while my security blanket is at the cleaners.”

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1 year ago  •  20  • Reblog
#joke #pray

“Yo God…(or is it Goddess?)…Who are you?…What are you?…..Where are You?…..How many of you ARE there? I can’t figure you out!”

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1 year ago  •  30  • Reblog
#joke #pray

“Dear God, please help me accept change in my life, but not yet.”

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1 year ago  •  28  • Reblog
#joke #pray

“Dear God! Give me PATIENCE and I want it NOW!”

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1 year ago  •  47  • Reblog
#joke #pray